I am male, and a recovering alcoholic. Following a detox recently, I am pleased to say that it’s great to be sober.
The problem is that I have lost my sex drive and have no interest what so ever in sex although it seemed to be ok when I was drinking. My partner is a highly sexed guy and I just cannot seem to perform on demand.
Will my sex drive return in time or should I consult my GP? Is there anything I could take or do to try and get it to return?
I am also very underweight and despite my huge appetite I cannot seem to put weight on.
Yes, please do contact your GP - in case there is any important reason for your lack of libido.
You need a physical examination and some blood tests. It may all turn out to be emotional, or connected with the aftermath of your previous drinking. But get it sorted at your GP's surgery.
Yes, I hope you'll get to see your GP really soon.
The other thing I want to suggest is that you might want to share this problem at an Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meeting. You will not be the first recovering alcoholic who has experienced this problem. Often giving up drinking means adjusting in all sorts of ways socially. For example, if all your great mates were heavy drinkers, you might find that to sustain your sobriety you needed to enlarge your circle of friends to include some who didn't drink!
Now, if – for the past few years – you've mostly had sex when you've been pretty inebriated, it may take your body some time to rediscover its natural response to sexual stimulus while sober. Does this make sense?
So, having sorted out whether or not there is any physical reason for your lack of sexual interest at the moment, you may just need to give yourself some time - and some care and nurture. You've been through a hell of a lot, and your body and mind may need some time to adjust to the 'new you'.
Dr David Delvin, GP and Christine Webber, sex and relationships expert
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